I was born almost ten thousand years ago,|
And there's nothin' in the world that I don't know;
I saw Peter, Paul and Moses,
And I'm here to lick the guy what says 'tain't so.
2. I saw Satan when he looked the garden o'er,
Then saw Adam and Eve driven from the door,
And behind the bushes peeping,
Saw the apple they were eating,,
And I'll swear that I'm the guy what ate the core.
3. I saw Jonah when he'mbarked within the whale,
And thought that he'd never live to tell the tale.
But old Jonah'd eaten garlic
And he gave the whale a colic,
So he coughed him up and let him out o' jail.
4. I saw Samson when he laid the village cold,
And saw Daniel tame the lions in the hold,
And helped build the tower of Babel,
Up as high as they were abel,
And there's lots of other things I haven't told.
5. I taught Solomon his little A-B-C's
I helped Brigham Young to make Limburger cheese,
And while sailing down the bay
With Methuselah one day,
I saved his long flowing whiskers from the breeze.
6. Queen Elizabeth, she fell in love with me.
We were married in Milwaukee secretly,
But I schemed around and shook her,
And I went with General Hooker
To shoot mosquitoes down there in Tennessee.
7. I remember when the country had a king.
I saw Cleopatra pawn her wedding ring,
And I saw the flags a-flyin'
When George Washington stopped lyin',
On the night when Patti first began to sing.